Yes, I am still alive (barely)

Okay, I know it seems I have dropped off the face of the earth. I am truly sorry to you all that I haven't blogged in forever. I have been reading all of your blogs periodically, trying to keep up on all that is going on in your lives, but I have either been busier than shit or so fucking tired I can't even think about turning on the computer. So, to recap the last month or so.

I went to New Mexico for a week after Memorial Day to teach Leave No Trace to the Philmont Boy Scout Ranch Staff, or whatever they are called. It was a blast, and the kids (I call them kids but they are all in their 20's) were very sweet and enthusiastic. They put me up in luxury accommodations that consisted of a canvas tent and two cots. It was pretty nice considering I expected to sleep in a little one man tent the whole time. However, the very first night I woke up around 3:00 a.m. to the noise of something moving around in my tent. Heart pounding (this is bear country after all) I grabbed the flashlight and turned it on. On top of my backpack sat the LARGEST skunk I have ever seen. I ran out of the tent, thinking "what the fuck do I do now?" and waited for the damn thing to get bored and leave. I had to wait 45 minutes for the sucker to finally decide find another tent to raid.

I also went to Vegas to meet up with an old highschool friend of mine. It was a blast, and we drank to excess. I drove home the next day on 3 hours of sleep and the worst hangover known to man. I thought I was going to hurl several times on the way home, but made it intact. I crashed in bed for about an hour, when my husband comes home and informs me that we have to go up the family cabin and join in the Father's Day BBQ. So, I fucking get up and drag my ass over there to pick at the watermelon and drink gallons of water. Then my Father-in-law tells me that some dogs had attacked my nephew's pet sheep and would I go look at it and see if (and these are his exact words) I can "doctor" it up. I love my father-in-law and would do anything for him, but for some reason my in-laws all think I am a vet. But I say okay, I'll go take a look.
Ken and I drive over to the farm, me holding some antiseptic cream and I see the sheep on the ground. I walk over to it and it is obviously dead. I look at it's wounds and am truly horrified. The dogs had ripped out the sheeps entire back end and part of its stomach. There was no way the sheep could have survived. I am not a miracle worker. Feeling sad and hungover, I drive home, and Ken informs me he wants to make a side trip to look at something. I tell him "no" I want to go home and sleep. So then he yells at me, trying to make me feel guilty about the hangover and how I never help him with anything, and he should have just left me home. WHAT THE HOLY FUCK IS THIS SHIT!!!!!!! I just went to HIS family's BBQ (he never attends any of my family functions) and I inspected one of HIS family's dead sheep. I am still pissed about that.

Thursday I backpacked into Ashdown Creek and met up with some other Park Service people to do more leave no trace. We all hiked out together on Friday, and I tore the shit out of my legs. I should have worn long pants, but it is so damn hot right now. But all in all, it was a fun trip with really good people.

Saturday night was one of my dearest friends weddings. It was so much fun, a day filled with food, drinks, dancing, and karaoke. Kiri and I sang "Teenage Dirtbag" "Down in the River to Pray" and "I'm a believer" together. She teamed up with some friends to sing "I like Big Butts" or whatever it's called by Sir Mixalot. Too stinkin funny. I sang "Wonderboy" with my good friend Jennifer (who was the bride), and "Sweet Home Alabama" by myself. My husband got drunk and decided the karaoke was a competition and kept telling me to sing them "into the fucking ground". He then proceeded to call one of the other guests a dog dick, and so I drove him home. I left his ass there, and went back to party some more with Kiri and my friends. We left at 1:00 a.m. Hanging out and singing with Kiri was one of the best times I have had with her in a long time. She doesn't want to hang with mom much anymore, so I cherished every minute, every song. She looked beautiful up there singing. God, I adore my child.

So that is it folks. I cut out a lot so as to not bore you all to death. But, just know that I am still here, and reading your posts. Summer is crazy busy for me, so my posts will be infrequent. I love you all.